I regret to inform you that this is not a positive letter. I have no warm, fuzzy feelings toward you. I, in fact, hate you. While it's true that I work at a zoo, and therefor am dedicated in conserving all things wild and of the earth, I do not care about you or the purpose you serve.
I have a vendetta towards one member of your species in particular. This little boy (or girl, forgive my ignorance, but I do not know much your sexing or reproduction) was being uncharacteristically quiet as I was walking towards my apartment door one night.
Now, Cicadas, this back story has nothing to do with you, per say. I am a single, mid-twenty year old female. Anytime I am walking alone at night I am on the defensive. I am ready to run, act crazy, or fight for my life at any given moment. Now imagine my fright when I finally unlock my front door and am beginning to feel relief only to turn the door knob and this cicada is SITTING ON THE KNOB.
Might I be overreacting? Possibly. But you cicadas have wings...you can literally fly away. You can rest anywhere you want. Please don't rest on my door knob. The scream that I produced was not necessary and if my roommate had been home she would have been worried.
I'm hoping we can live and let go, but I also hope for your extinction.
Regrets,
Connie
PS; It also wouldn't hurt to not leave your molt out in the open. You're not easy to look at.
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